Stirring story demonstrates how U.S., Malian cultures worlds apart

This summer I read Monique and the Mango Rains, by Kris Holloway. Kris recounts her service in the Peace Corps, where she was partnered with the village midwife, Monique, in a village in Mali, Africa. Their partnership evolved into a deep and lasting friendship and forever changed Kris’s life.


I know (on a mostly superficial level having never experienced extreme poverty firsthand) that I’ve got it good here in the US. To read an account of the vast disparities between here and there, it doesn’t seem at all possible that we exist on the same planet. The average Malian earns, in an entire year, around $230.

Life is very hard, especially on the women. It boggles my mind that women make the meals, serve the men first, and then serve themselves and the children what’s left, if any. Over 96 percent of girls undergo circumcision in varying degrees of severity, often leading to lifelong problems and even death.

Monique worked with no electricity, no running water, and no emergency help. In her work with her, Kris realized that Monique’s ‘simple tools, clean hands, and sharp mind’ contrasted so sharply with US hospitals, where technology and not touch was the status quo, that when Kris came back to the US and had her own babies, she chose homebirths with a midwife.

This book made me laugh and cry. There are several stories that stand out, but the one where Kris relates her conversation about inviting Monique to fly to the US to visit had me laughing so hard I cried, and I was completely sucker punched when I came to the end and read the sad reason for Kris and her husband’s return to Mali.

This book (the library has it) will stay with me for a long time.

This 'wild woman' looking for others to join her pack

I think I have made a brief mention this book before here, Women Who Run With the Wolves, but it deserves a column of its own. At the beginning of the year I wrote about creating the life I want and being a wild woman. I got that term from this book. I vow to live closer to the wild this year and to connect with other women seeking that same life. Here is an excerpt from the book that is profoundly moving for me (and trust me, there are many more, as my incredibly highlighted copy can attest).


“To live as closely as possible to the numinous wild a woman must do more head tossing, more brimming, have more sniffling intuition, more creative life, more 'get down dirty,' more solitude, more women's company, more natural life, more fire, more spirit, more cooking of words and ideas. She must do more recognition of sorority, more seeding, more root stock-keeping, more kindness to men, more neighborhood revolution, more poetry, more painting of fables and facts, longer reaches into the wild feminine.”

Yes, this book is amazing and has value for every woman. Have you read it? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Through the myths and stories retold in this book and the commentary and deep insights offered by the author, Clarissa Pinkola Estes, I think you’ll find this book speaks deeply to your soul. I would also love to form a Women Who Run With the Wolves ‘pack’ (if you will) and meet monthly to discuss parts of this book and to talk about our path and how to reclaim our wildish selves, “that place where there is time and freedom to be, wander, wonder, write, sing, create, and not be afraid”. So, who’s with me?

Roots: historical novels with Indiana ties

If you’re an avid reader, maybe you too have a book list—a list of books that you have read and loved, as well as books you want to read. I have plenty of books on my ‘to read’ to keep me occupied for probably a couple years, but I have recently added a couple more. It’s all the better if they combine and intertwine factual history with fiction, leaving the reader with a greater sense of place, awareness of and appreciation for the events, places and players in history. Here is a list of three acclaimed novels: Stardust by Noblesville author Kurt Meyer, The Massacre at Fall Creek by Jessamyn West, and Follow the River by Indiana resident James Alexander Thom.

Stardust is set right here in Noblesville and is a compelling story of love and loss. Once you read this book, you will be drawn to walking around ‘Old Town’ Noblesville like never before—compelled to seek out homes and commercial buildings featured in the book, as well as noticing (perhaps for the first time) the magnificent buildings that Noblesville once had that were torn down in the name of ‘progress.’

The Massacre at Fall Creek takes place around Pendleton in 1824 and is the account of the capture, trial and execution of five white men for the murder of nine peaceful Native Americans. There is a marker denoting the spot near where the massacre occurred on State Road 38 E, near Markleville (east of Pendleton).

Follow the River depicts the kidnapping of Mary Ingles from a Virginia settlement by Shawnee Indians in 1755 and details her escape from captivity and one thousand mile journey to return to her people.

I haven’t read the last two books yet but they’re next. All three books are available at the library.

Creating the life I want

(In this article I referenced a book in a sentence that was cut in the paper, I guess due to being over my word count, oops.  The book is Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes and it's one of my favorites.  That's where the term 'wild woman' comes from.)

I will be authentic. I will be true to my feelings and unique perspective on the world. I will make my voice heard, mostly by whispering, shouting when necessary. I will break through taboos of mainstream thought and collective consciousness. I will question. I will wait for answers. I will take time, unapologetically, for me. To light incense and candles and whisper prayers to the Creator. To move to music that moves me deeply.

I will listen to my intuition. I will spend time dreaming, then set to work to manifest those dreams into reality.
I will take long walks and think. I will be still and just be. I will paint a picture and not judge the end result, just enjoy the process and the joy of creating. I will check out more books by intriguing authors (and collect more fines on my library card). I will write in my own books, underlining passages and scribbling in margins. Through books, I will continue to discover my own unique voice.

I will be a wild woman, a woman who has her own passions and who is creating her own personal revolution. I will feel and love deeply. I will connect with other wild women and we will laugh and learn and lift each other up. I will constantly do my life over—if I’m not happy with something in my life, I will work to find solutions and create the life I want.

I will reflect on the past year—triumphs, risks taken, and unfinished business (to see a New Year Questionnaire, see my blog). I will create my new year on paper and on purpose, and I will become more of who I really am this year and this new decade. I will be authentic. May you be, too.

Krista Bocko lives in ‘Old Town’ Noblesville and loves to read in the middle of the night when all is quiet. Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes is a favorite book. She can be reached via her blog at http://www.cachetwrites.blogspot.com/.

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New Year Questionnaire
(I got this from a friend, I don't know who to credit)
Completing and Remembering the Past Year:


What was your biggest triumph this year?

What was the smartest decision you made this year?

What one word sums up and best describes your 2009 experience?

What was the greatest lesson you learned in 2009?

What was the most loving service you performed in 2009?

What is your biggest piece of unfinished business in 2009?

What are you most happy about completing in 2009?

Who were the three people that had the greatest impact on your life in 2009?

What was the biggest risk you took in 2009?

What was the biggest surprise in 2009?

What important relationship improved the most in 2009?

What compliment would you liked to have received in 2009?

What compliment would you most liked to have given in 2009?

What else do you need to do or say to be complete with 2009?



Creating 2010:

What would you like to be your biggest triumph in 2010?

What advice would you like to give yourself in 2010?

What is the major effort you are planning to improve your financial results in 2010?

What would you be most happy about completing in 2010?

What major indulgence are you willing to experience in 2010?

What would you most like to change about yourself in 2010?

What are you looking forward to learning in 2010?

What do you think your biggest risk will be in 2010?

What about your work are you most committed to changing and improving in 2010?

What is one undeveloped talent you are willing to explore in 2010?

What brings you the most joy and how are you going to do or have more of that in 2010?

Who or what, other than yourself, are you most committed to loving and serving in 2010?

No TV or phones? Yes, kids, that's the way it used to be

In November my daughter and I went to a local craft show on a whim. Just as we were on the way out, we walked past a few more tables. I nearly missed the small table with the books on it, then the woman stopped me and invited me to take a look. I was drawn to the titles, one of which is the title of this article. People that know me know I am enamored with old homes and aprons and vintage Pyrex and the like, so I’m always thrilled to listen to stories from people that lived in earlier times. The author, Laura Konger Nicodemus, grew up on a 30 acre farm in the 1930’s near Churubusco, a small town north of Fort Wayne
It had always been Laura’s dream to paint a picture of the daily lifestyle of a child growing up on a farm, and the text and the illustrations in these four books is delightful and informative. Children are fascinated to learn that there wasn’t always electricity, TV, phones, and she ‘shares the feeling of freedom from the visits to the outhouse in the middle of the winter cold and the summer rains’ when indoor plumbing was installed.

I bought the set of four books and Laura autographed them. I am excited to read them with my children and open up their minds to how children their age used to live, compared to the relative life of luxury they live today. These books are a great classroom resource for elementary teachers also. Visit www.tcswoodentoys.com or The Wild at 884 Logan St. to purchase ($20 for the set of four). I’m also hosting a Christmas giveaway on my blog, an autographed set of these four books! Tell me something special you remember about your grandparent(s) or parent(s). The winner will be announced Dec. 25th.

Merry Christmas!

Thank you for playing along!  Be sure to sign in or post your email when you leave your comment so I'll have a way to reach you!  Pass this on, too.  Good Luck!

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And the winner is....Kristen (Emlynsmommy)!  Thanks again for these great memories and Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!  And welcome to Noblesville, Michael.  :)